*PLEASE DO NOT THROW EGGS, BRICKS OR ANYTHING ELSE AT THIS BLOG - IT IS JUST AN OPINION!*
I feel compelled to write about something that's made me feel quite queasy... The cover of a magazine which shows a woman stood smiling whilst her four year old son stands on a stool next to her - with her breast in his mouth.
I'm sorry, I know all about "Breast is best", but there is something not quite right seeing a child over the age of about two, being breastfed. The woman on the magazine was apparently breastfed until they age of six by her own mother, something that - in my humble opinion (having a 4 and 5 year old) - could quite easily lead to bullying. A child may mention their "feeding" method whilst at school, and five and six year old children are becoming capable of making fun and finding things odd. A child of that age doesn't need their mother's milk anymore! So do they do it for fear of losing the close bond with their child? Because if the bond is only there because of the "feeding" then surely something is not wholly right anyway?
My own mother attempted to breast feed me as a baby, but I didn't take to it and she used to get so upset and unnecessarily stressed that she gave up trying; I see nothing at all wrong with this. I am a happy, healthy, intelligent woman, I am no worse off for not having breast milk as a baby. I work out, I have a healthy diet (mostly), I don't smoke (four years clean) or do drugs and I drink alcohol in moderation (again, mostly). I didn't breast feed my own children, in all honesty the thought of it made me squeamish, although I did use a pump for a few days for my prematurely born son who was in special care after birth, and I have two perfectly healthy, happy, bright children. I find that many people are "bullied" into breast feeding by the constant reminders that breast is best. I spoke to a midwife on an examination after having my son, she was brusque to say the least and when she mentioned my son "getting home and being on the breast", I didn't dare to inform her that I had no intention of breast feeding. A woman I know who had a baby at more or less the same time as me, told me (through yawns) that she sat up in bed for hours at a time whilst her daughter fed, fell asleep, fed, fell asleep and so on. Whereas both of my children were more or less sleeping through by about eight weeks as I had gotten them into a feeding routine as soon as possible (my son was in a routine on his return from hospital at ten days old).
I'm not damning breastfeeding, far from it; I think the women that persevere and want to do it and enjoy doing it are admirable and it must be a wonderful thing for them. But for the women who feel guilt and shame and that they are bad mothers because they either don't want to or can't breastfeed, don't beat yourselves up; not breastfeeding is just that - it isn't something you should feel forced into, nor is it something that is for everyone. You can have a healthy child either way, or unfortunately, an unhealthy child either way.
There is more to parenting, much more, all of which usually involves questioning yourself, and feeling guilty that you're doing something wrong. Don't add to it!
I feel compelled to write about something that's made me feel quite queasy... The cover of a magazine which shows a woman stood smiling whilst her four year old son stands on a stool next to her - with her breast in his mouth.
I'm sorry, I know all about "Breast is best", but there is something not quite right seeing a child over the age of about two, being breastfed. The woman on the magazine was apparently breastfed until they age of six by her own mother, something that - in my humble opinion (having a 4 and 5 year old) - could quite easily lead to bullying. A child may mention their "feeding" method whilst at school, and five and six year old children are becoming capable of making fun and finding things odd. A child of that age doesn't need their mother's milk anymore! So do they do it for fear of losing the close bond with their child? Because if the bond is only there because of the "feeding" then surely something is not wholly right anyway?
My own mother attempted to breast feed me as a baby, but I didn't take to it and she used to get so upset and unnecessarily stressed that she gave up trying; I see nothing at all wrong with this. I am a happy, healthy, intelligent woman, I am no worse off for not having breast milk as a baby. I work out, I have a healthy diet (mostly), I don't smoke (four years clean) or do drugs and I drink alcohol in moderation (again, mostly). I didn't breast feed my own children, in all honesty the thought of it made me squeamish, although I did use a pump for a few days for my prematurely born son who was in special care after birth, and I have two perfectly healthy, happy, bright children. I find that many people are "bullied" into breast feeding by the constant reminders that breast is best. I spoke to a midwife on an examination after having my son, she was brusque to say the least and when she mentioned my son "getting home and being on the breast", I didn't dare to inform her that I had no intention of breast feeding. A woman I know who had a baby at more or less the same time as me, told me (through yawns) that she sat up in bed for hours at a time whilst her daughter fed, fell asleep, fed, fell asleep and so on. Whereas both of my children were more or less sleeping through by about eight weeks as I had gotten them into a feeding routine as soon as possible (my son was in a routine on his return from hospital at ten days old).
I'm not damning breastfeeding, far from it; I think the women that persevere and want to do it and enjoy doing it are admirable and it must be a wonderful thing for them. But for the women who feel guilt and shame and that they are bad mothers because they either don't want to or can't breastfeed, don't beat yourselves up; not breastfeeding is just that - it isn't something you should feel forced into, nor is it something that is for everyone. You can have a healthy child either way, or unfortunately, an unhealthy child either way.
There is more to parenting, much more, all of which usually involves questioning yourself, and feeling guilty that you're doing something wrong. Don't add to it!
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